From: "Annie" <anniebillyt>

I've always had to be frugal, so my children were raised that way. I did
give serious thought to teaching them life skills that the school
wouldn't offer. I raised six children; four of my own and two of my
sisters. I also had numerous nieces and nephews who spent summers with
me on the farm. For the past 15 years,. I've participated in a local
program which matches up older people who are willing to be advisors to
teen parents. I'm still involved in the lives of some of the kids I've
mentored over the years. I've tried to pass on frugal/necessary life
skills to as many of the kids who were willing to listen:-)
Here's my list:

How to cook from scratch, including such basics as how to measure. How
to make simple things like salad dressings, white sauce, tartar sauce,
etc.

How to make up a menu with well balanced meals, based on what's on sale
or in season.

How to shop by considering how many uses you will get out of an item,
how many meals it will make, as well as how much it costs per weight or
measurement.

To comparison shop on services as well as goods.

How to do simple sewing like making a skirt with an elastic waist, as
well as mending and basic sewing stitches. A few weeks ago, I helped a
young woman make pillowcases out of $1 a yard flannel from Wal Mart. I
had her price what ready made cost. She was surprised at how simple it
was to make a pillow case and how much she'd saved.

Gardening. It's surprising how much one can get from a single raised bed
diverted from flowers to veggies. 

Budgeting. To consider what is really a necessity and what is frosting
on the cake, so to speak. To separate wants and needs. To look at the
long term and delay gratification. To think for yourself and don't go
with a fad or style just because it's the current "in thing". To be
aware of where their money goes and to question if it was worth it. 

I've encouraged creativity. Areas like proms, I've encouraged them to
think out of the box. How can you get the desired effect without going
the usual route? For example, one of the boys traded his labor with a
local seamstress in return for a prom dress for his girlfriend who
couldn't afford a dress. This went on to weddings, as they got older. We
gave one of the girls a beautiful wedding for $400, about 7 years ago,
by using talents of various family members and friends. One of the girls
wanted piano lessons, which she couldn't afford. She approached her
highschool choir teacher with the offer of trading work for piano
lessons. She plays beautifully and is often asked to play at weddings.
She volunteers with an organization that gives free music lessons to
underpriviledged children.

To consider cooperative measures to get more access to things. I'm from
a big hillbilly family where sharing things was a normal way of life. We
all managed better by sharing. For example, I babysat my brother's ADD
child and in return he kept my vehicles running.  My children have
shared apartments with each other, clothing, seldom used appliances,
washing machines, etc. Not as nice as having sole use of an item, but at
least you have the use at times.  

I taught them to balance a checkbook... which also familiarized them
with our family financial situation:-) To figure interest and know how
much something REALLY costs once the interest is paid on the purchase.

The steps of house buying, what "points" means, arranging inspections,
how to do a lot of your own inspection,etc.

To be aware of financial matters. For birthdays, I've given numerous
copies of Suze Orman's book and the Tightwad Gazette series.

How to change the oil on their car, do routine auto maintenance, and
basic repairs. Enough about auto mechanics to know when they're being
lied to by a mechanic:-)  ("The muffler bearings are bad?")

To do basic household repairs like changing a faucet, caulking a shower,
installing a light fixture, etc.

To take advantage of free services like libraries and the extension
service. To look for free entertainment like concerts in the park. To
enjoy simple pleasures like a  well cooked meal at home, served outside
on a nicely set table. To entertain themselves by reading or playing
cards and board games. My girls, now in their 30's, started a weekly
boardgame night when they were in their early teens. (I think the common
link was that they were all Duran Duran fans.)  I provided popcorn. Most
of the girls brought something to share..chips, etc. so it wasn't a big
expense for any one person. They're all married women with children now,
but they still get together once a month for boardgame night:-)

To seek appropriate advice when confronted with a problem, rather than
ignoring it hoping it'll go away. Letting things go on is seldom frugal.
If home remedies don't work, either pay for a drs. visit or seek out a
low-cost clinic if a dr. is out of the question. If your research
doesn't give you an answer to a legal problem, invest in a consultation
with a lawyer. If that's out of the question, go to legal aid. 

To use reference materials to cut expense. Learn to do new things. In
the 80's, we got running water at my farm. I got books on plumbing from
the library and had some of the kids learn to do plumbing with me. One
of the boys tells me that what he learned from helping me got him a
caretaker job with a free apartment while he went to college:-) 

Network. The more people you tell about your search for a used car,
desk, or whatever, the more likely you are to find one. Also develop a
support network. Sooner or later, you'll need someone to pick you up at
the emergency room, help you move, etc. Join a church if you're
religious, otherwise volunteer for a cause or political group you
believe in. You need to have some friends and it's easiest to make
friends with people who share a common belief or interest. 

This might come more under philosophy: How to be assertive and set
limits so that you're not taken advantage of.  Not to be a person who
takes advantage of others. If you do wrong, admit it and make amends.
Never lie to your doctor or your lawyer. <G>

Last but not least, talk to the kid about bad life choices. I talked to
both sexes about how unfair it would be to a child to bring them into a
situation where they wouldn't be able to take care of them. One of the
boys had a flaky girlfriend. I asked him if he would trust her with a
puppy. He said no. I said, "How about with an innocent baby?" He paled.
I informed the boys that I would help collect child support from them,
should they be foolish enough to reproduce before marriage. The youngest
boy was pleased to finally get a room to himself. I was concerned about
his relationship with his girlfriend, so I pointed out how crowded the
room would be with her and a baby sharing it with him....  I encouraged
all of the girls to seek a career before marriage and not to have any
more children than they could take care of alone.  I discouraged any of
the kids from getting married before 25. I pointed out that they usually
didn't care for the style of clothing they'd picked out a few years
earlier. Would you want the spouse you would have picked out when you
were younger? They seemed to find that a reasonable point. I also
pointed out that very few people regret NOT having married earlier.  The
youngest marriages my kids have had was one girl at 23 and one at 28.
They're both happily married. The others have been in their 30's before
marrying. No children born out of wedlock. No divorces. 

What would y'all add to my "curriculum"?
 
Annie