7 Things You Must Do If You Want To Have "Bully Free Living" by Stephen E. McChesney Confidence, motivation, and self-esteem. These are character traits we want in our children and ourselves. It is not just children who are victims of the bully. You might be intimidated by the CEO of a huge corporation who holds your job in his or her power, or by a bully who lives down the block, or by a co-worker, your hairdresser, your spouse, or even your own kids. 1. Build the self-esteem in yourself and your children Self-esteem is like a muscle. You must exercise it to build it and keep it in top shape. To have self-esteem is the same as saying you feel good about yourself, you like yourself. Ask yourself if you would like to have 'you' as a friend. If you've answered yes, then you have self-esteem. If the answer is no, we have some work to do. 2. Daily inspiration Sometimes our lives are so busy that we don't take time to 'stop and smell the roses'. Tiny things may trigger us to take a moment and reflect or project. This could be something as small as a sentence in our email every day. 3. Protect your children Parents will go above and beyond when it comes to protecting their children. One way to protect our children is to step between them and danger. Another is to prepare them to protect themselves. Not with violence, but with wisdom. Take little steps, day by day. You'll be surprised at the distance you've covered over time. 4. Wisdom is a key The definition of wisdom is 'The ability to discern or judge what is true, right, or lasting; insight. Common sense; good judgment.' "It is a characteristic of wisdom not to do desperate things" (Henry David Thoreau). I like to define wisdom as 'Knowledge, and knowing how to use it'. Bully Free Living requires wisdom. Again, tiny steps day to day. 5. Self-confidence To walk with confidence is to repel the bully. Bullies are, more often then not, cowards. They will target an easy victim. One that walks with no confidence, head down, shoulders slumped. Self-confidence goes hand-in-hand with self-esteem. You can build the confidence in yourself and your children by encouraging the participation in activities that you (they) are good at. 6. Success in life Being successful in life is different to different people. To me, being successful in life means achieving the goals that I have set for myself and being the best parent, friend, neighbor, co-worker, boss, employee, husband, and future goal setter that I can be. My youngest daughter feels she is successful in life when she has successfully manipulated me :). 7. The skill of listening We've all heard the saying that we were given ONE mouth and TWO ears, so we should listen twice as much as we talk. There is a skill to listening; I mean really listening. Think about how you like to be heard. It makes you feel good that someone else cares enough to listen. You spread that good feeling whenever you listen to others. Therefore, more self-esteem is being spread. Bully Free Living is something that we must prepare for. It's not really a difficult task. In fact, simple things will lead us. Something as simple as our thoughts. Although it is not difficult, if we don't think about it, it may just sneak up on us. An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Steve McChesney is the President of Mac Stephens Productions, Inc. He and his wife, Lisa, are the publishers of 'Bully Free Living' ezine as well as the bully-free-living.com website.Their daily inspirational tips are short and to the point. For more information please visit: http://www.bully-free-living.com